Wednesday 21 April 2010

Brain cell overload...

I have just found out why men think they are better than women. Multi tasking.
Because in general women have to multitask more than men, they get in more of a muddle. Men on the other hand base their superiority on the fact that they can walk and chew gum – but face it folks, that’s it. If you asked a bloke to walk, chew gum, do the washing, pay the bills, get the children to school, let the dogs out, feed the chickens, get coffee for the builders, assess the number of bricks required for a wall, write children’s party invitations, do a little work then they would be as dippy as I am and there’s science to back it up as well! I know ‘cos I read it in the newspaper in a brief moment of calm when my poor brain only had to read and drink rooisboch tea.
Basically the report, which I read in a four day old purloined Daily Telegraph (I haven’t got round to ordering my own yet from the village shop after nine years living here so I rely on pre-loved newspapers left on trains, the ground, round today’s fish and chips), says that the brain can only deal effectively with two things at once and as soon as you add a third task (3 tasks! heck most of us have to juggle a whole lot more than that) everything goes to pot.
So the fact that I forget things on a regular basis and am considered basically unhinged is because I am over loaded and never more was this prevalent than today.
We are on Day Three of the new school and Mother has had to get up a whole our earlier everyday just to keep up with herself. The journey to the school only takes 10 minutes longer but those precious ten minutes make a whole lot of change necessary. Whereas before Mother could drop Bog Boy off at nursery before school i.e. at 8am she now has to take Bog Boy with her on the hour and a quarter round trip because Nursery doesn’t take anyone in before 8am and The Boy has to be at his new school by 8.15am a whole quarter of an hour earlier than at the last place. Thus the school run has been brought forward by 25 minutes. I can deal with that, but I don’t know the roads very well, Bog Boy complains bitterly THE WHOLE WAY and of course I as yet don’t know the new school routines. There’s also the fact that I don’t actually know anyone there anyway. I don’t know a lot do I?
Added to all that and the mild anxiety that it all engenders The Boy wants to invite all his new class to his party on Saturday. I agreed and there lies the rub by doing this one task too many I got myself into a whole load of trouble.
I delivered The Boy and his invites to the school on time and in the correct manner. I chatted to some of the Mummies and thought I had made a good impression. I wandered off in a bit of a haze thinking about getting Bog Boy to nursery and dwelling on the fact that I would shortly have to cross the A140 at rush hour in order to do so. Everything seemed to go fine and I was about to celebrate my achievements with a nice cup of tea when I noticed that I had not given The Boy his pills. The Boy has Absence Seizures (Petit Mal) and although missing the pills wouldn’t be too bad it’s also not good especially if he has to go swimming. So I returned to the school to give him the missing pills and to leave a strip just in case I forgot again with Matron.
When I got to the school I met with The Boy’s new form teacher coming out of the staff room at break time and we laughed about forgetting things and joked. Just as she turned to leave she asked if I was alright.
Me, querying: Yes
Her: Just that I had a Mummy asking after you this morning.
Me getting worried: Oh, why?
Her: Well she said that when she asked how you were doing you said not desperately well and wandered off!
Me, slapping my hand to my mouth: Oh GOD! I have no idea why I said that in fact I can’t remember saying it at all!
I really can’t remember saying it. I have no recollection at all of saying it. I now will have to go up to a virtual stranger at picking up time and apologise in front of everyone else too. OOHHH the embarrassment! The ignominy! I shall be forever marked…ah well better that than being all scary and hyper organised!

13 comments:

Expat mum said...

I love it when I ask the Ball & Chain to make one phone call from work and he comes back in the evening saying he didn't have time. Just bloody well make time!!!

It's a Mummys Life said...

Well at least you have an impression, maybe not the one you wanted but she clearly didn't forget you!

Maggie Christie said...

I'm so glad it's not just me. I'm sorry for laughing this much, but that outside the school encounter is just brilliant!

You're right about men and multi-tasking. They come over all superior, mine just because he mended the shed roof and ironed his own shirts. But not at the same time!

SmitoniusAndSonata said...

Sorry , it's not funny , no seriously , I'm not laughing ...
I get to see the mothers rushing in , offspring in tow .... but once , memorably , alone .She'd forgotten him .
So , in fact , you're doing well ! Sometime soon , casually drop Marathon and Pole Expedition into the conversation ... preferably in the same sentence .
That should shut them all up .

Trish said...

I didn't realise your son had moved schools. I must keep up!
I do hope he is happy at his new one and actually, the other mothers sound very caring to me!

PippaD said...

I am sure that the other Mummy was pleased to meet you and wants to be your friend and thats why she was asking after you to the others... honest.

Lou Archer said...

I'm sure you've had dozens of awards/shout-outs/stalkers BUT I've nominated you for an award anyway....do with it as you see fit. Thank you for your blog
Lou
x

Dorset Dispatches said...

Scary and hyper organised is too much to bear. I didn't realise your son had moved schools either, did that happen whilst we were moving (how dare other people do big life things whilst I am, I can't keep up!). Hope it's going well, scaring other mummys and all! xx

Nicola said...

What a great post.

Have just been playing 'catch up' and have also read your other blog. Very brave. I identify with a lot of what you have written - tho I would rarely admit that to people who know me.

Not From Lapland said...

two things is the limit? we'll Im screwed then, but it does explain a lot.

Ladybird World Mother said...

Oh GOOD! You do that too. Thank god. xx

Tattieweasle said...

Expat Mum - I usually get that HE was too busy!!!!
It's a Mummy's Life - I seriously worry about the impressions I give people as they rarely correlate with the one in my head...
Preseli Mags - Men! Why do they need applause for the jobs done?
SmitoniusAndSonata - Glad to make you laugh not sure I'll show them all my attributes in one go, could put them off me for life!
Trish@Mum's gone to - it's strnage I don't seem to put big life events down rather the smaller ones; and yes the other Mummies seem really nice and friendly for a change!
Mummy - Heck I hope so, otherwise the sight of me crawling around on all fours in teh class room saying to eldest where are your pants ias really going to put the cat among the pigeons!

Tattieweasle said...

Lou - Good grief I am so sorry only just seen it. Wonderful! I love awards....thank you!
Brit in Bosnia - movng school saga was too huge to blog about following on from all the bullying I wrote about earleir in teh year. But good news is one week in and The Boy seems to be thriving! Hope all's well with yours too!
Nicola - Thank you and really not brave at all...
heather - I think I understadn teh term screw loose at last!
Ladybird World Mother - do you think we should form a soriety?

Go on you know you want to...

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